Here is an idea that sounded great at the time but ended up being not what I had expected. I don’t regret it now but its something I will never need to do again that’s for sure.
I was in Varanasi for a few days while traveling though India. While there I had visited the banks of the Ganges river and it was an amazing and yet surreal experience. Along the banks kids play cricket, people bath, and dead bodies are burned. It’s practically a circle of life right before your eyes. Visiting is enough of a spiritual experience but I thought I would take it one step further…
It took me forever but I had finally found it. Blue Lassi. I was told by every traveler that I had met that I needed to visit this lassi shop. They make a thicker lassi than you normally find in India and tourists love it. I love it too. While there I first had the banana pineapple which was great! The place was empty when I got there but as I ate it filled with tourists eating lassi’s. I had nothing else to do so I just hung out and ate yet another lassi. This time just pineapple. The shop filled with people again and then emptied out.
This time the staff noticed me staying and started up a conversation. We talked about the tourists, my travels and Varanasi in general. When the last person left he leaned over to me and asked if I had ever heard of a Bang Lassi. I had at this point kinda heard about them from a few other travelers but nothing bad.
He tells me if its something I want to try he could help out with a bit of a nod and wink. It seems there is a mild, medium and “Full Power 24 Hour” version of the famous Bang Lassi. Feeling brave and thinking of how cool it would be to high and watch the sunset on the Ganges river I agree to medium strength.
The guy takes my cash $10 I think, and heads off down the street. A few minutes later he returns with a plastic bag and heads into the back room. I am highly curious at this point. I have not been high since I was in Amsterdam and that was a great experience. Moments later and my special lassi arrives. Banana/Bang!
The flavor is something that I will never forget. Even writing this now brings the flavor back into my mouth. The other lassi’s I had there were great and fruity…but this…this was a whole different story. It tasted horrible! It was like eating grass clippings and banana yogurt mixed together. I forced myself to eat it since I knew I needed to fully experience the true bang lassi experience.
I finish it off and head down the narrow alley to the river bank. I feel nothing at this point and I wonder if I had been scammed or made to eat actual grass. But like with all edibles it just takes time to kick it.
I found a spot on the stairs and sat down and just watched these young guys play cricket. I must have sat there for an hour or more before it hit me. I tried to turn my head to watch the ball and I suddenly realized, I was high as shit! Like woah turning my head is crazy, high. I get a huge grim on my face and continue to watch them play.
Other people start to notice the random white guy who has been watching the game for 2 hours and a few get curious. One guy slowly scoots over across the stairs closer and closer to me. Until he ends up next to me. I am not high enough to not notice a guy move 20 feet just to sit next to me, so I say Hi. It starts to be more and more blurry around this time so the entire conversation isn’t important.
This guys story was that he was just SUPER thrilled to meet an American and to be speaking English. From what I could tell his family was very poor and had paid to send him to school in Varanasi to learn English. He was just amazed that I could understand what he said and that he could have a conversation. It was simple things like what country I was from, how long I was visiting India etc. But I had never seen anyone so happy to chat with me.
Next yet another guy sees his chance and heads over to us. He is not shy at all and just sits down and jumps into the conversation. This pretty much scares off the poor English kid and he slowly leaves. It was as if a bigger predator had shown up and run off the weaker one. This new guy goes straight into some massive amount of text he memorized. It had something to do with Alaska. He went on and on spitting out these stupid facts about Alaska. Its population, the weather, city names, on and on. This is not the kind of thing you want to do when you are high as shit.
But things had been every so slowly getting worse and worse for me. I had no idea but while I was sitting there I was getting HIGHER. At this point my brain tells me I need to be back in my hotel room ASAP. Almost a panic came over me and I knew I had to leave the river side.
I have no idea how fast I was walking or how long it took me to get back. The streets were a sea of people but I felt like I was moving in slow motion though them like I was in the Matrix. I weaved in and out the crowds like magic. I thought I was running but who knows.
When I finally get back to my hotel room I collapsed onto my bed and tried to sleep it off. I put Bob Marley on my head phones laid back and closed my eyes. Usually one of my favorite things to do while high. But I was the wrong kind of high… This wasn’t weed at all! It was something else. After 10 minutes of trying to chill I couldn’t take it anymore. I changed the music to punk rock since I needed something way faster, the high demanded it.
But the music didn’t last long. Things started to get weird and I was happy I made it back to my room. The experience was more like mushrooms than weed. I started seeing things, the room was spinning around like crazy and I felt almost out of body.
Things from that point got weird, I mean really weird. I learned a lot about myself that night. I wont go into detail since it was very personal and nearly spiritual in nature. But I came out a much better person that I was before.
The next day I had to catch my train to Bodh Gaya. But I was still high when I got on the train and when I got off. I was coming down for sure but still high enough to know I was still high. I made it with no problems to my room in bodh gaya but that evening and the next three days I paid the price.
I had finally gotten sick in India. I mean really sick. I couldn’t leave my room for a whole day because I needed to be near a toilet. The next day I was able to venture out to find food just because there was nothing in me left to come out. This continued for 4 days total before I was feeling better. I don’t know if it was the lassi’s that got me sick or something else I had eaten. But I will forever remember the horrible taste of that Bang Lassi and how sick I got after I ate it. Even just writing this story down has recalled the flavor back into my mind and has made me feel quite sick.
So if you ever visit Varanasi and think a Bang Lassi is a good idea, think twice. If you are looking for an experience like mine then go for it! But I am telling you now, its not fun to try one and try to just relax and watch the sunset.
